Ondřej Halama

„Takže v 1968 mi bylo dvanáct. Pamatuji si, když v roce 1969 jsme porazili Rusko v hokeji, tak to byl celostátní svátek. V Mladé Boleslavi žil jakýsi pan Liehmann, který je vzorem pro Hrabalův film, kde je tam mohutný vousatý chlapík, který vozí kozu v bouráku. Tenhle ten Liehmann, oba synové emigrovali do USA a zařídili mu, že v Mladé Boleslavi jezdil v bílém bouráku, značku nevím. Ten pan Liehmann byl velký antikomunista, on byl taky zavřený v 50. letech. Byl trnem v oku komunistům, a v tuhle dobu když to bylo, bílý buick jel přes celé město, auta troubila, lidi byli byli na náměstích, skandovali, až nakonec došli, protože Mladá Boleslav byla centrum sovětských vojsk, byla jich tam spousta a obsadili hlavní kasárna, došli až před kasárna. Byl tam s námi tatínek z těch kasáren, dodneška to ve mně je, se otevřela brána. Vyjel tank, sklonil hlaveň a začal se točit do lidí. Říkal jsem si jako malý kluk - On snad začne střílet. K tomu samozřejmě nedošlo. Ale je to takový zážitek dvanáctiletého kluka, který ve mně hluboce zůstal. Ta hrůza, která by mohla nastat.“

„Okresní církevní tajemník byl celkem mladý muž, původně kantor. Nevím, proč to šel dělat. A byl nesmírně aktivní, neuvěřitelně aktivní, Když to někdo dneska člověk někomu vypráví, tak se tomu ani nechce věřit. Tehdy církevní tajemníci nejenomže kontrolovali, co se ve sboru děje, ale tenhle ten jednou za rok přijel a procházel naše účetnictví. My jsme měli jen peníze, které jsme si sami vybrali. Tehdy byli faráři placení z okresního národního výboru jako státní zaměstnanci. To bylo na základě zákona, kdy na jedné straně ukradli církvím, co mohli, a pak jim platili duchovní. A když přestali platit, tak skončili duchovní. Nemohli jsme hospodařit ani s těmi s penězi, co jsme si vybrali. Vzpomínám si, když jsme se tam na faru stěhovali a měl jsem malé děti. tak jsem koupil jsem průtokový ohřívač vody nad dřez. Průtokový ohřívač vody stál asi 1200 korun. On přišel na kontrolu účetnictví a tam jsme se opravdu chytli, protože byl nějaký předpis a já jsem o něm nevěděl, že sbor si může pořídit ze svého vlastního rozhodnutí jen věci do výše 1000 korun. A co je nad tisíc, byť je to z jeho vlastních peněz, tak jen se svolením tajemníka.“

“I replied to him: ‘In that case, I will not make use of my civil privilege, my civil right to vote, and I will not go to vote.’ I didn’t have a clue what my attitude would cause in the army. One simply cannot go there in civilian clothing, they register that he has not showed up, and if that person held some more important position, well, they would go after him and make his life miserable. If that person was let’s say, an ordinary worker, from whom they had nothing to take anyway, well, they did not take anything from him. Well, and then it all broke loose. They started interrogating me about everything and they began asking me about the military service and shooting and everything. And of course, they made me tell them my views, such as that being in the military was very disagreeable to me, and that I could not imagine that I would shoot at somebody or use a weapon against another human being. ‘What would you do then?’ And so I replied: ‘I don’t know, I would shoot in the air, I would not shoot at people.’ Where all this was leading to was that they needed to corner me into a situation when they would be able to get rid of me after I had already resigned to the fact that I would have to go and do the military service. And in the evening before the election day, a car with barred windows, a prison car, arrived to Kutná Hora, and they took me to the detention prison in Prague-Pankrác. It meant that I was discharged from that battalion or whatever it was in Kutná Hora and the battalion in Kutná Hora then had a 100% participation in the election.”

“He was really that type of a good fatherly person at that time, and he explained all this to me and he told me: ‘Look, I am able to - if you as if say that you are able to take the oath - then I will get you out of it. You will get some probationary sentence and they will let you go and then they will make you do military service again or something like that.’ I don’t know precisely. At that time, or now as well, I regarded this as a cowardly attitude and I felt that I had to hold firm to my beliefs and I felt like John Huss as if at the moment that he was going to be burnt at the stake he said: ‘You know what, I take it back.’ Because it was immensely unfair that although they had taken me away from Kutná Hora and my first talk with the prosecutor… the prosecutor is the one who accuses you, the state prosecutor, and his first question was: ‘Please, be so kind to tell me why you don’t want to go vote.’ It was clear that it was done in such a way that they would get rid of me because I didn’t want to vote.”

“So I tried to submit my application for study at the faculty of theology. Not that I would primarily want to study it, but the faculty of theology was a school where people said that if somebody applied for study of theology, then that person was lost for the regime anyway, and that person would not become a regime’s supporter anymore. And the faculties of theology were not administered by the ministry of education but they were transferred under the ministry of culture. And in case of a pastor’s son, that ministry of culture could say: ‘His father is lost, and the son is lost, too, so let him go study theology. The churches will perish soon anyway.’ That was the idea they had at that time. And so I passed the entrance examinations, but for I was not admitted for the first time. I don’t know the reason, there were not many applicants, but I was not admitted.”