Věra Smržová

“Dad also said: ‘You won’t dress in that red rag! If I see that, you’ll be seeing something!’ So I wasn’t a Pioneer. To get a place in the school, I had to be one. The headmaster came to me and said: ‘Look, never mind your dad, we’ll manage without him. Would you accept being a teacher?’ - ‘Yeah, I might.’ - ‘You’ll join the Pioneers secretly, you’ll leave your scarf at school and we’ll sign you up for a teaching school.’ And so it was. I was a secret Pioneer, the scarf stayed at school, and it was a good thing. I passed the entrance exams and set off to Carlsbad, I lived in a dormitory, and I liked it there. But! I was in my teens, everything was different, and they kept pushing stuff at you from all sides, so I completely... Not that I’d stop believing, no, but I pushed somewhere deep down. Because I joined the folk troop, we had to go to all sorts of political meetings to sing to them and dance and carry flags. At the teaching school we had to sign that we were having ourselves removed from the Church - all of us who were believers. We participated in May Day parades and the such. When I think about it now, it seems like we were crazy. We immediately had to join the Youth Union and become Pioneer leaders because we were preparing to work with children. Everyone led a troop in some school - so yet more scarves. If Dad had known! But he does know... We marched in parades and everyone kept singing: ‘Susie asked Jackie, Jack...’ We did silly things like that, but we were happy.”

“One time I was on a trip in Germany, and that’s where it turned around in me. I had still believed in God and Jesus, but in Germany we were at a feast of thanksgiving for the gifts of the land, and they had very nicely prepared. There was a band and a procession bringing an abundance of food to the church. I was there with my neighbour. Inside the church they suddenly started singing the hymn Jesus, O King [a well-known Czech hymn - trans.], which of course I knew from my childhood. I started crying. I’m still moved by it, even today. I was completely swept off my feet by it, and suddenly it all came back. It was a turning point, I returned to my faith and to church. Before that we had long been living opposite the church. We would go there with our children for Christmas or the feast days, but that was more as folklore. Back then in Germany it changed, and since then it’s back inside me. Now I really am a Catholic who is active in all ways I can be, I sing in the choir and am glad of it. I’m glad of everything.”