Rudolf Smahel

„Také jsme prožili Vánoce s tímto Václavem, kdy jsme dostali trochu bramborového salátu v ešusu a kousek ryby. Nechali nám otevřené okno. Byla velká zima. Takže když jsem si stoupl na špičky, tak jsem viděl do vězeňského dvora a říkal jsem si: ‚Máme Štědrý večer a co teď.‘ Tak jsem řekl: ‘Tak Vašku, stoupni si před dveře, aby bachař neviděl.‘ A já jsem pomalu pískal do dvora všechny koledy jednu za druhou. To bylo takové krásné, nosné. Oni volali: ‚Děkujeme, krásné Vánoce a ještě pískej a zpívej.‘ To byl takový můj prožitek. A Václav stál a stál a kryl a mlžil, aby bachař neviděl.“

„Tak jednak spolupráci, protože většinou začali tím: ‚My víme, že jste velmi nadaný člověk, víme, že máte zkoušky navíc na teologické fakultě, víme, že chcete dělat doktorát. A Vy zajisté víte, že doktorát Vám musí povolit stát. Takže tady se můžeme domluvit.‘ Já jsem samozřejmě řekl, že ne v žádném případě. Buď doktorát čestným způsobem, tak jak to má být, nebo nic. Čili žádné domlouvání. Například říkali, že nemusím vůbec nic podepisovat a potom už říkali, ať si to rozmyslím, že by to byl jen formální podpis, nic jiného. Takže tady jsem se zablokoval. Takové nabídky jsem prožil myslím dvakrát.“

„Seznámil jsem se s mým dobrým kamarádem, já říkám Jeníkem Palachem, protože to byl bezprostřední kamarád, který prožíval tu situaci velmi hluboce. Právě proto, že se účastnil, myslím dvou brigádách v Sovětském svazu, se skupinou našich studentů a viděl tu hrůzu, jak tam lidé mlčí, jak se bojí mluvit, jak ztratili pravý smysl života a ovládl je strach, který byl opravdu odůvodněný. On právě říkal, že se bojí, že ty represálie přijdou k nám. Měli jsme víc takových hlubších hovorů a s Jendou jsem se viděl naposledy před Vánocemi, kdy jsme si přáli šťastné Vánoce a po Vánocích jsme se už vůbec neviděli. Pak už jen přišla ta špatná zpráva 16. ledna odpoledne, že Jan podstupuje tu největší oběť. Já jsem to prožíval duchovně. Modlil jsem se, aby jeho život byl zachráněn. Takže vlastně začala ta moje taková hluboká změna. Co je praví smysl života, že si člověk nevystačí jen s kariérou a že je potřeba jít také do nitra. Tak jsem potom přestoupil do Olomouce na teologickou fakultu na tak zvaný poslední povolený ročník státem, protože pak se zase uzavíralo a boslovci a teologové mohli později studovat jen ve velmi omezeném množství.“

“I have a very good friend, Zdislav Havran. When our trial was about to begin, he traveled to Katowice in Poland where he publicized our indictment. So by September 1981, when the trial was supposed to be held, all of Europe knew about it, including all the details and the charges from the indictment. It appeared in all the western media and was one of the most closely followed trials in all of Western Europe. Journalists from France appeared in Olomouc and although they were kept out of the courtroom, they were able to get some information on the case. So, you could say that our case really made it to the headlines and front pages of newspapers all over the world. I later found out that at this time Gustav Husák was receiving a lot of international mail. In Germany, they even produced a postcard with a picture of the five of us. On the other side the postcard read “Olomouc 1981 – Mr. President, these people that are in jail are innocent. We support them, do everything in your power to release them.”

“I was very much inspired by Jan Palach. As a student, he did a summer job in the Soviet Union for two years where he got the chance to see what life was like there. He would tell us about the miserable living conditions in the country. How people were living in shacks and that they didn’t even dare to protest or state their opinion. They rather preferred not to care about politics and just worked and worked, being grateful for not having to starve again. So in fact, Palach was warning us. He said that we would have the same living conditions in Czechoslovakia if the totalitarian regime of the Soviets was introduced. He said that it would not come at once but rather gradually, unnoticed, in small changes. He was very skeptical in this respect. You could say that he was a very thoughtful man. He couldn’t bear the fact that our nation was being occupied in this way. It really hurt him inside - you could see it on his face. Some people would just say that you could not do anything about it, that it was a reality and that was it. But he wasn’t of that sort. He really struggled with it, he was in agony. His decision to protest against the occupation in the way he did was the result of a long mental process, it wasn’t a spontaneous decision.”

“The death of Jan Palach was truly a turning point for me. I realized what’s really important in life and rearranged my priorities accordingly. I started to study theology and started to care for other people, especially for young people with whom I worked with at the Faculty of Theology in Olomouc. In groups, we analyzed the Bible, discussed many important topics of life and faith and I held numerous lectures and seminars. We did most of this at weekend houses or in summer camps that were organized outdoors. Back then, you didn’t have the kind of opportunities to promote your activities as you have today. You couldn’t simply put up a poster saying you’re organizing a meeting. I spoke to everybody personally and everybody noted it down in his diary, mostly in coded language. I did this because I had already been at interrogations by the state police. The circumstances of my consecration were very peculiar. There was this bishop, Mr. Vrána, who was very much liked by the state. I have a very good memories of him. The day before I was about to be ordained, the police agents came to Vrána and demanded that he must not ordain me. They said that I would never become a priest. But he objected and told them that I met all the religious criteria to become a priest and that he would ordain me the next day and that it was none of their business. He was very courageous to do that. The next day he ordained me and three others who were also engaged in youth work.”

“It all began with the permission of the district secretary to print university textbooks for the use of the theology students at the department. The textbooks were distributed among the students and the rest was scrapped. We did the printing during the night shifts and it was here that we decided to print censored publications as well. So we got a couple of boxes of extra printing sheets and reproduced publications that we then handed out to various groups. This was sort of a conspiracy. We had to be very careful about this. Our samizdat activities really began during our student years."